Tag Archives: bi-polar

The Difference Between Being Depressed and Having Depression

The Difference Between Being Depressed and Having Depression

Most people don’t realize that there is a difference between being depressed and having depression. I know this because when people find out that I have struggled with depression they often ask, “What were you depressed about?” or have suggest a simple remedy: “You should get out of the house more!”. I don’t blame the people. We only have one word for depression after all. Thankfully the dictionary reminds us that the same word can mean two different things:

de•pres•sion

: a state of feeling sad

: a serious medical condition in which the person feels very sad, hopeless, and unimportant and often is unable to live in a normal way.

Most people don’t realize there are two definitions for depression. I hope this post helps to change that. Maybe this will become a place to which the depressed can refer friends and relatives who don’t seem to understand what depressed people are going through. Continue reading

Major Depressive Disorder and Anxiety Are Not Spiritual Issues

depression-is-not-spiritual

Major depressive disorder and Anxiety are not Spiritual Issues. They are mental issues. Depression and Anxiety are no more spiritual issues than a broken leg is. Do you know how I know this? Because honestly prayer, activities, church, ministry, life changes, attempts to flush out sin, none of those things improved my depression and anxiety. Medication did. Medication that alters the chemicals in my brain so that it functions as it should. If it were a spiritual issue… would medication work? I would say no. I am not aware of any spiritual issue that medication has any effect on.

It makes me nuts that someone can have cancer and we’re 100% supportive. No one in the church would ever dream of accusing them of being out of the Will of God or in a situation where they need more faith. But those who struggle with depression in our more traditional or ignorant churches find themselves inundated with input that is not only completely unhelpful, it actually compounds the problem. Continue reading

Ready For Ministry? Maybe Not.

not-ready

Recently I have dared to dream about the possibility of returning to ministry… maybe even ministry to children… but I have so many restrictions for what that return looks like that I know I am still not ready.

I recently have been very tempted to jump into an opportunity that has opened up. It would be a Sunday-only, volunteer position with a limited commitment of only a few months. It seems perfect for where I am right now. The desire to do it is new and makes me wonder if I will one day return to full-time ministry. I could imagine myself doing Sunday services with the kids… even at my worst Sunday services were never really a problem. It’s all the other mess that would probably revert me into being a basket case.  Continue reading

How My Life Has Been Rocked By Depression

“Depression, that’s why”.

Whatever question you may have about my lack of social media interaction, lack of podcasting, lack of artistic expression, and more recently, lack of job, can be answered by that sentence.

Depression is a broad term that people like me say so they don’t have to talk about anxiety, mood swings, physical pain, hopelessness and more. Especially when talking to people who don’t know much about it. Which is most people. Not that I’m actually talking to that many people.

I’ve struggled with depression in general for a few years now. It started as a general feeling of doom. I went through every day just feeling like everything I did was bound to fail. A friend suggested I see my doctor for this, which blew my mind that you could (or would) see a doctor about such a thing. So I did and I was given a series of meds. Some worked for a while, some didn’t work at all, others brought out anger, and another made me want to sit on the floor all the time. Eventually through months of trial and error we found a drug that managed my serotonin levels and things were just dandy. They stayed that way for about three years.

In those three years I had left my children’s ministry position at a large church in Kansas City for a church in St. Petersburg. Florida was where my wife wanted to raise our kids. Closer to family… and the beach. I was convinced that the high-stress of my former job was the cause of my depression. I didn’t even think to mention it to my new employer and pastor. It was something in my past that we had gotten through and over. The new job surely would make taking any pills unnecessary. Continue reading