When I was a younger man it was a popular thing to hang cute cross-stitched signs over your toilet. Usually they were very frilly with flowers, kittens and a message that made it feel good to be a woman.

Not being a woman I thought it was a bit odd that none of these stitched signs ever addressed men. Men are the ones standing in the correct position while in the bathroom to be able to read the signs after all.

So I wrote my own cute poem. I bought some fabric, thread and a needle and cross-stitched my own “cute” sign for men and had it hanging over my toilet until I got married and my wife replaced it with a lighthouse painting with a scripture.

Here is that poem.

If you’re a guy and this you’re readin’
Then most likely you’re a peein’

But if you’re readin’ what you’re seein’
Are you seein’ where you’re peein’?

See it’s funny because anything over a toilet is a bad idea. We men need to be able to focus on what we’re doing. So my little poem addressed that issue and every other little thing I found hilarious about the cross-stitch trend.

What? You think this is just a silly story? Need some proof? Well you’re in luck! It just so happens that I still have my cross-stitch creation. Enjoy.

Note the yellow stitching on the pink carpet. What could that be?

Click it to make it big enough to read.