More kids are getting mobile phones: Last year, more than 35% of U.S. children ages 10-11 had cellphones, almost double the amount in 2005, according to Mediamark data, via eMarketer. And more than 5% of 6-7-year-olds had cellphones last year.
That leaves the 8-9-year-olds in the 20% bracket. When will we have to add “Turn off your phones” to the Children’s Church rules? Have you already?
[via Gizmodo]
Have you ever been in a situation where your wife is having a bad day and everything you try to do to help doesn’t help at all? I think every husband who cares about the wellbeing of his wife has.
I’ve found that when my wife is having a bad day it’s typically because of one of the following reasons:
My default response it to try to “fix” her bad mood by offering advice and trying to talk her out of it. This has never worked, but until recently it’s all I knew how to do. Even when I offered a fix that included time away or a nap, I would find that even if she accepted my offers, it didn’t always help the issue.
Lately I’ve found that the best thing I can do for my wife is to get her to talk about what is bothering her. Sometimes it takes a bit of pestering on my part to get her to open up. Especially if she feels silly or stupid about the issue. When she does begin to talk, I sit and listen. I do not offer advice. I have plenty… but I keep it in my mind like a check list for later. I limit my responses to phrases that show my interest and sympathy. Ninety-nine percent of the time just her talking about what is bothering her helps her day turn around.
The advice that I’ve stored up then becomes my mental to-do list. So rather than offering up promises of things that I will do to make life better for her, I instead begin doing them and/or offering to.
Try it out and see if your wife’s day doesn’t turn around.
I can count on more than two hands how many times I’ve had disgruntled volunteers express to me their desire to involve more parents in their ministry or program. Though I do agree that it seems few parents take the same interest in their children’s spiritual lives as they do their extracurricular lives, I do take issue with this complaint. I rarely see a true desire for parental involvement but rather volunteers who are either desperate for help or who are struggling and angry and want ‘pay-backs’.
Maybe I’m a bit to stuck on principal but I think motive makes a huge difference here. I’m not interested in recruiting parents only to place them with volunteers who have agendas or misguided expectations. I’m not going to set up my new recruits to be a scapegoat for some imagined wrong.
To a point I understand the view some ministers get of the parents they serve. We struggle with their kids while they get to go to service. We watch them socialize in the hall while we wait to go home because they haven’t picked up their child. It’s easy to start thinking that things would be different if they were on our side of the fence. Parents would get a taste of their own medicine so to speak. Plus, we need more help anyway… it’s a perfect fit, right?
Parents can’t be both our enemy and our salvation.
(selah)
They are neither. We have a enemy. We have a Savior. We wage war against one (not flesh and blood) and we pray to the other (to send laborers). It’s not fair or in any way right to recruit parents under the curse of the former and the burden of the latter. When we as ministers, leaders and volunteers realize who our true enemy is and where our help comes from, then we are ready to welcome parental involvement with open arms.
But is it enough to simply involve them? (More on that in later posts.)
In the mean time… what is your experience? Have you ever been cornered by an eager volunteer with the “perfect solution” to your worker shortage? Have you yourself ever struggled with “hating-on” parents? Leave your thoughts and feedback in the comments.