I wrote and illustrated this story for my new church’s Christmas Eve service. Though it’s after Christmas now, I thought I’d share it so I can at least reference it next year.
Imagine if you were the family who took the very last room in Bethlehem… and had to watch Mary being led around back to a stable. That’s the premise of this original Christmas story.
This video was filmed at Highland Park Presbyterian Church on Dec. 13th, 2009 as a part of their Club Christmas Youth Service. It’s awesome.
If you don’t get it… you need to watch this.
Update: Credit to Les aka @hstrykid via Twitter for the find.
What do you do when your baby pukes out his last three meals all over your wife?
You take the baby and let her run to the restroom!
And if you’re Sam Lussier, with who’s family we were having a delightful lunch, you take a picture of it!
I got major points for the way I swept in and saved the day, allowing her to go and clean herself up. Those points are pointless however now that I’ve posted this photo.
Everything should be finished and ready to go before Sunday morning. 90% of frustration alleviation is preparation!
Each volunteer depends on the others to be at their post on time to serve their role. Parents and Sunday School Teachers depend on us to open the doors promptly. Starting service on time adds predictability which is important to children when establishing order.
I hate downtime. Volunteers who are doing a part of the service should keep their eyes on their schedule and skip ahead. If their segment is coming up, they should be ready (with their team if they have one) and pass me on the steps going up while I’m coming down.
If someone needs the microphone during the service… they need to have asked for it before… or while I’m not on the stage.
I want us to enjoy our time with the kids… and them with us. The way to do that is to maintain an understanding of mutual respect between ourselves and them.
I’m not interested in my children’s church becoming the “Pastor James Show”. If there is a leader who would like to assist by taking a segment here and there… or even every week… they only need tell me. Pretty much anything short of the teaching and altar time is available.
<img class=”alignnone size-full wp-image-2094″ title=”fight” src=”http://www.nlcast.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/fight.jpg” alt=”fight” width=”245″ height=”208″ />
The other day I took my family to a local park so the kids could get out some energy. Our new apartment isn’t well suited for it really.
We hadn’t been there long when seemingly from no where a group of 35-40 teens gathered in the center. There was an energy in the air. I noticed they were all focused on a couple of young men. It’s been nearly 20 years since I’ve been in High School… but I still remember what it looks like when a fight is about to break out.
This was no ordinary fight though. There were tons of teens around. No one was trying to step in or talk the boys out of it. Even when punches starting being thrown no one stepped in like I remember kids doing. I jumped on my phone and punched in 911 and was routed to the police department.
I screamed out, “Hey Morons! I’m calling the cops!” To which some random watcher near me responded, “So.” I did my best to describe to the officer what was going down and why I was concerned. The fight did end and the crowd started to walk away quickly as word got spread that some guy had called 5-0.
Most of them walked right past me and glared. One girl said, “Why do people always call the cops?” another boy shouted, “I bet you feel all hard dontcha?” I didn’t. I felt stupid but I had to do something. I can’t sit by and watch that go on without a proper response. My daughter and son are to precious to have a bunch of thug kids take over their park and show them that violence goes without consequences.
I was left with a few questions in my mind.
1. Are there really 35-40 families who don’t care where their teens are at 5pm on a Monday?
2. “Why do people always call the cops?” she said. How many fights like this have you been to?
3. What happened to a basic respect for adults… or at very least adults with pre-school children nearby.
4. How many of the kids in that group would call themselves Christians… but did nothing, said nothing… and never even thought twice about it.
God help us.
Three weeks already? Has it really been that long? It’s been crazy busy. Not really the work… but learning how to work in a new environment. Nearly everything is new and what isn’t new is done differently. Procedures I learned from one place have really messed me up on this end of things (I pressed 4 to delete a voicemail… should have pressed 2).
Things are wonderful, don’t get me wrong… but rather than talk about the awesome stuff, I’d like to hash out a few things I’ve already learned about starting a new position (aka, things I messed up).
Wherever you go, there will be people in each church who are similar. Just because knew one of them very well in your old church doesn’t mean that relationship transfers to the new person. One week is way too soon to be making ‘Yo Mama’ jokes.
When you move positions, you carry along your experiences. Most of those will come in very handy and help you bypass a whole lot of mess. On the other hand, some of it will cause you to assume certain things that were true in your old place to hold true in the new. This is not necessarily the case. Kid flag teams are not always the cheese.
Nobody cares what they did there… how hot or cold it was… how good or bad it was. You may have been there for a decade… but God has moved you forward and upward. It’s time to leave those things behind you and press on to the goal that God has for you. That being said however, at my old church… we did a lot of cool stuff.
The first time people see you they will make a snapshot of you for their future reference. They will choose how they speak to you and what they say based on that snapshot. Make sure you present your true self even if you’re not at all impressed with it. You cannot maintain an image for any long period of time anyway. If you don’t speak in a southern accent normally, it’s not a good idea to adopt one just because you moved South.
I’m all about getting any advice from any of you readers who have made a move such as mine. Any tips you would add? What mistakes have you made? What did you learn? Drop them in the comments.
Thank God for Senior Pastors. Where would we be without them? Jobless that’s what. Love um or want to strangle them… be thankful for them. Your anointing filters through his office after all.
I know we never have enough… but remember to be thankful for those you have!
Where would we be without parents? We’d be preaching to an empty room! Our job is to support and educate them as they raise up their children in the way they should go. No, they’re not all doing it… but thank God for them all anyway.
Every one of these little guys is a gift from God. The fact that we have the honor, privilege and responsibility of ministering to them is huge. Thank God for the simple trust they place in us.
Thank God for the Internet and CMConnect.org.
Maybe you’re meeting in an old choir closet… but be thankful. Just one missions trip will be enough to make you thankful for anything with a roof, floor and air conditioning. Someone will always have it better… and someone will always have it worse.
God called you to minister to his kids. That Call will keep you going when almost nothing else can.
There are others doing what you do… and most of them are more than willing to share what they know… and need the experiences you have gleaned.
Those who have them, you know why you should be thankful. Those who don’t have one or more… hurry up and get one so you can be thankful too.
For almost every children’s minister out there, there is a supportive (or at least tolerant) spouse. Thank God for those who help us (or at least allow us) to do what we do.
What are you thankful for in Children’s Ministry?
When I first started full-time Children’s Ministry, I had a pretty narrow view of what children’s ministry was. In my mind it was all about the Children’s Church service. Sure, I had other programs I was over (Rangers, Missionettes, JBQ, etc.) but they were just the side show to my three-ringed circus. Therefore when it came time to name my department, I naturally went with the name of the kids church. JAM City became JAM City Children’s Ministries.
Not a big deal right? Maybe not, but I soon realized that without intending too, I had set the ministry I was directly involved in as the most important program in the department… and the cost of demeaning the role of the other groups. It took me a couple of years to realize this fact… and for the feelings of my program leaders to get to me. They felt that all I cared about was “my” ministry… and everyone else got whatever was left over. This was my wake up call.
I needed a way to quickly get the point across that things were going to be changing. So along with making myself more available and getting more involved, I made another small change that made a big difference. I renamed the Children’s Department. JAM City Children’s Ministries became The Kids Life Department. I kept JAM City name for kids church only. What did this do? It was a neutral name that showed no preference to any particular program, and it equalized all of the ministries. After all, each program fulfills an equally important role in the spiritual development support we provide to our families.
The renaming didn’t work miracles… but it was the first step in a process. Now that I’m in a new position, I’m going to be changing the name again. Kid’s City Children’s Ministries will become Suncoast Kids Department, the first step in unifying our volunteer staff and leaders and letting them know that they are valuable and valued.
I met my new church today. I was a little worried to be honest. Here I’d moved my family halfway across the country from Kansas City to St. Pete, Florida to work as the Children’s Pastor for a church I’d never even been to. I say I was worried… but honestly, I wasn’t. Two reasons:
1. God has worked out so much and made this move so obviously a part of His will I knew this would be no different.
2. The leadership of this church is what attracted me here. They could have been handling snakes and I would have been okay. (That last part is a lie… but almost not.)
After service there was a Children’s Ministry luncheon prepared to introduce me to the lay staff. I shook a lot of hands, met a lot of great folks and forgot a whole mess of names… though I do recall that two girls who were named after Disney Princesses and a dude named Nathan with a very happy Dad.
I wasn’t prepared to say anything… but I was asked and so I walked to the front. I didn’t feel like telling them about where I had worked, how hardcore it was, how many folks I’d had working with me or any of that. The things that were burning in my heart to share were…
It’s a healthy ministry where kids are growing and being taken care of. I’m not here to fix something that’s broken, but rather to nurture and direct the growth that is already happening.
I don’t usually talk like this… but there was a healthy, family, friendly spirit in the room. I’m sure I’ll bump heads with someone in there eventually… but they seemed eager to accept my family and hit the road running!
These folks have recently said goodbye to a CP and then held down the fort for at least nine weeks waiting for us to arrive. I’m not going to barge in and ignore the hard work they’ve put in. I’m sure we won’t be doing it exactly the same 3-6 months from now… but I’ll bet I’ll enjoy the things they do as much as they enjoy the tricks I have up my sleeve.
All in all… it was a fantastic day. (Except for the part where I told the staff that I had prepared a rap for them.) It was cool seeing the church as just another person before I have to go in and be Pastor James. It allowed me to see things from a first-timer’s perspective (which is a very hard thing to do later on) and let me experience the worship service without pressure.
Tomorrow morning I start my first week in the office. Woo hoo!
<img class=”alignnone size-full wp-image-2087″ title=”moving” src=”http://www.nlcast.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/moving.jpg” alt=”moving” width=”300″ height=”300″ />
While packing our house I have realized (yet again) that my wife and I think differently. Not only that, but we think differently from two different perspectives… even when we have the same goals. <strong>This isn’t because we’re two different people (it’s not a personality clash for once), it’s because we have two different roles.</strong>
Her role is the organizer. It’s her job to keep the family working during this entire process. She wants to keep us comfortable and herself sane. My role is the loader. It’s my job to do the heavy lifting and get everything from here to Florida in one piece. This translates into one person who wants everything in a box and every room cleared out… and another person who wants to keep a lot of stuff right where it is till the last moment.
This is more than about moving… It’s given me a chance to think back to past conflicts and wonder how many of them were not because of some huge, deep-seeded issue, but rather just because we had two different jobs to do.
Jennifer is a Mother, for instance. She has a different role with the kids than I do. She handles them differently than I would… but that doesn’t make her wrong. We both have the same goals, to raise great kids, but we have different parts to play in that goal. <strong>We’re not always going to be working together to see our goal reached.</strong> If it really takes two to make things go right, it takes two perspectives as well.
If two people have the same goal, there is no reason they can’t find a way to come alongside one another, even though their roles differ, to have harmony in the process. An added bonus would be to have those two roles not only accomplish the task, but benefit and enhance the other’s role as well.
In the case of our move, giving each person a chance to represent and explain their perspective can go a long way. <strong>Understanding how the other person sees things, rather than simply defending your own view, can relieve tensions and build unity.</strong> Our roles in the move appeared to be in opposition to one another. This created conflict, but once we explained our views and understood one another, a compromise was possible.
<strong>Compromise doesn’t always mean nobody gets what they want. Sometimes it means you adopt a little of the other’s way of thinking as your own.</strong> You realize that your perspective was a bit to limiting and you weren’t 100% right. A perfect compromise is when both parties do this.
So in the end… I’m going to get to pack up more than I would have… and she’s going to be able to keep out more than I had wanted… and it’s all good.